Menulis Surat Cinta Itu Mudah
Bukan congkak, bukan sombong. Ketika saya berusia kurang lebih 9 tahun, saya telah menjadi guru baca-tulis pembantu saya yang ketika masih berada di kampungnya selalu tinggal kelas. Pembantu saya ini saat ini masih setia menjadi anggota keluarga kami dan hebatnya, setelah beliau dapat membaca dan menulis, dia lebih pandai menulis surat cinta dibanding saya…
Banyak orang ingin menyampaikan rasa cinta kepada “target”-nya, tetapi tidak tahu bagaimana caranya. Sebagai orang yang menjunjung tinggi romantisme, saya pribadi akan sangat tersanjung jika ada orang yang mengirimkan surat cinta kepada saya. Sayangnya, tidak pernah ada, dan akan terlalu konyol menyedihkan jika saya menyuruh pembantu saya yang mengirimkan surat cinta kepada saya.
Jika anda ingin mengirimkan surat cinta kepada sang target di hari Valentine’s ini, anda dapat minta bantuan situs ini. Sayangnya, target anda harus memahami bahasa Inggris karena (bodohnya) belum ada situs yang dapat membantu anda menulis surat cinta dalam bahasa Indonesia.
Ini surat cinta “karya” saya:
My dearest Bodoh,
How are things going for you, my darling?
Sweetie, I just wanted to tell you that you’ve always been a wonderful part of my life. Whenever I think of you I melt and get a fuzzy feeling on the inside. Theres just something about you which I can’t help liking.
What person in their sane mind could resist your mysterious black eyes which remind me of pools of crude oil. If your eyes really produces that stuff then lets go into the oil business. Oh darling, we could be really rich!
I really admire your gorgeous, mysterious black hair. Whenever I see it I can’t help but notice how shiny it is. I often wonder if you clean it using shoe polish. Technically speaking that would work, but I guess it would smell a bit weird, so I reckon it must be naturally shiny.
I love sitting on the couch with you and talking for hours on end. I think its great fun to wind you up by asking you baited questions like “Who is the better sex, men or women?”. Oh how I love to watch your nostrils flare up, and your face turn red. The best part is when you stomp around insisting you are right, like a 2 year old brat. Its the cute little things like that which I really love about you!
My love for you is sweeter then sugar, and there is no other love for me ….OK, perhaps I got a little too excited cos I also love my mobile phone which I use to run my life with. Its kinda cute how you always threaten to shove it up my rear whenever I get 2000 text messages which somehow always seems to occur when we are out on a date together, but thats not important right now! (But if you ever see me drooling over it, then it is important, unless you get mad because I am not giving you any attention)
I can’t remember if I’ve already told you this but I really do love your chest. Its such a turn on to look at and its one of the many reasons I love being with you my love. Sometimes I wish I could do nothing but stare at your chest all day, but I’m not sure that’s a good idea my love, as people will probably think I’m some kind of nut case and I might get taken away by the men in white coats.
Anyway darling, I must depart now. I really can’t wait to see you again, especially if you are gonna be wearing sexy White underwear for me! Go on, surprise me! I’ve often wondered what you would look like wearing those, and many a nights have gone by where I would sit and fantasise about you wearing White underwear and I would have no need to watch music videos any more.
Happy Valentines Day, my true love!
Yours tenderly and lovingly,
Aku
Terlalu gombal dan konyol? Memang! Tetapi bagaimanapun, menulis surat cinta itu lebih mudah dari mencintai. Buktinya? Pembantu saya tidak pernah berhasil memacari para penerima surat cintanya…
Tags: letters, generators
February 14th, 2008 at 10:48
kalo saya dua-duanya mba’ nulis surat susah, pacaran juga susah